I NO LONGER ACCEPT CLIENTS
Welcome to my website. I have been offering counselling and psychotherapy in the UK and around the world since 2000. I support women going through significant life changes e.g. bereavement, trauma, life-threatening illness, relationship issues and mid-life crisis. They often experience feelings of isolation, anger, guilt, shame, insecurity, anxiety and despair.
When my husband died of Parkinson’s Disease, it gave me a deeper insight into suffering, bereavement, grief, loss and trauma. Together with further professional training, I learn that we can still live well oscillating between grief and restoration work and I want that for my clients too. A crisis means both danger and opportunity in Chinese. A breakdown can be a breakthrough.
Bereavement and grief is an inevitable life stage and the Kubler-Ross' 5 stages of grief model tends to be misunderstood. The bereavement process is much messier and I have now started specialising in this area. I want my clients to feel heard and accepted and that what they are going through is normal.
Bereavement may trigger past traumas and I have retrained as an EMDR* Trauma therapist and am a member of the Complex Trauma Institute here. The word 'Trauma' is also a misunderstood word. It is less about the event per se and more about our reactions to the event. This depends on how well we were and are supported internally and externally. The more I see clients and attend courses on trauma, the more I realise how complex trauma can be and how it impacts on our body, brain and nervous system. There is the danger of retraumatising clients and it is important first and foremost to provide you with resources to self-care and self-support.
Added to processing grief and trauma, there is often the call for forgiveness of others and self. Forgiveness is yet another misunderstood word and I endeavour with my training and experience in running Forgiveness Courses to help you work through this.
Sometimes, talking therapy is not enough. I also provide tools e.g. guided meditations, hypnotherapy, dream analysis and resource materials to engage my clients in a variety of ways. I myself write poems as a way to articulate my own experiences.
Both my poetry book From The Heart here and my late husband’s companion memoir Getting On Falling Off here are available on Amazon.
In addition to counselling and psychotherapy, my services include:
- Life Coaching
- 8 Week Mindfulness Course.
In the following pages, you will get to know who I am and how you can benefit from the different services. Here is a taster of what each service offers and my clients' experiences:
COUNSELLING AND PSYCHOTHERAPY
I offer Counselling and Psychotherapy to people going through significant life changes e.g. bereavement, trauma, divorce, separation, job loss, life-threatening illness, mid-life crisis, which result in feelings of aloneness, insecurity, desperation and depression.
Joyce has been a witness to my soul journey since 2007, spanning the move from Europe to Asia, different roles and jobs. Hers has been the steady voice that reminds me to nurture love, compassion and tenderness in the face of longstanding grief, confusion, anger, fear and loneliness. In Joyce, I have found a counsellor of considerable integrity and skill, an attentive ear of a caring sister and a human heart of much warmth. Her presence in my life comforts me as I surrender to my path.
Angel Sing, executive
Joyce has had a tremendously positive impact on my life. She has helped me to come to terms and make peace with some very difficult family circumstances. Joyce always approached our sessions with great empathy, compassion and understanding. She also helped me to develop a greater sense of self-acceptance and self-compassion which has enhanced my quality of life beyond belief. Joyce is a highly-skilled and, in my opinion, a most wonderful psychotherapist, counsellor and life coach. I cannot recommend her highly enough.
Catherine McCarthy, teacher
For more information, please click here to visit my Counselling and Psychotherapy page.
EMDR PSYCHOTHERAPY
EMDR* is recognised by NHS and NICE** as the first treatment for those who suffer from PTSD*** symptoms. This applies to both adult and buried childhood traumas. Repeated studies have shown that by using EMDR therapy, clients experience the benefits that once took years of psychotherapy to make a difference.
The approach helps the brain reprocess and release distressing and traumatic memories frozen in the primitive / reptilian brain. Once the trauma is released from the body and the brain, you start to heal and discover your own inner resources and insights as to how you can live your life more fully.
During the recall of the traumatic event, you will receive bilateral stimulation in a rhythmic left-right pattern. The stimuli can be something you hear, see or feel which involves either:
moving your eyes from side to side alongside the movement of my index and third fingers or
tapping movements on different sides of your body.
Since all my work is now conducted online, I will synchronise your tapping with mine so you will be guided by the sound of my tapping.
For most clients, a small number of sessions are offered. For those who have experienced very severe trauma or more than one trauma, the therapy can last for a year or more.
* Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing
** The National Institute for Health and Care Excellence
*** Post-traumatic stress disorder
When I first went to sessions with Joyce I was feeling very lost, afraid and unsure of myself. Through the EMDR work I am reclaiming my life and myself again. I am reclaiming my power and my existence after suffering from trauma that had continued to haunt me. Our sessions together helped me realign my core beliefs about myself from "I am worthless" to "I am worthy."
Joyce showed me how human experiences are there to guide us, some experiences more painful than others but it's nothing to feel ashamed about. She has helped me to feel comfort in the hardest of times and that my own emotions are there to guide me not torment me.
I now meet myself with the same warmth and loving kindness Joyce showed me. Her warm smile and caring words are something I will cherish with me forever. I cannot praise her enough for all she has done for me. A million thank yous.
Zahra, Psychological Wellbeing Practitioner
I approached the EMDR trauma work with some trepidation, unsure of what to expect, and equally unsure of how it would work in a virtual situation. The sessions were conducted via FaceTime, and were so realistic that it felt like I was in the room with Joyce all the time.
I don't know how it works, but it certainly dismissed my feelings of anxiety surrounding some toxic familial relationships, resulting in a change in my attitudes both to the importance of events in the past, and to how I allow these to influence my behaviour as an adult.
I was able to access resolution from my own resources, giving me control and responsibility for my own improvement. This was a valuable experience, as, given the source of the presenting problems, taking responsibility was an essential aspect of healing and moving forward.
I developed insights into the sources of my own personality and reactions to situations, enabling me to deal with future challenges much more positively and confidently.
Anne Martin, teacher
FORGIVENESS PROCESS THERAPY
Simply put, forgiveness is an act of self-love. It takes seriously the awfulness of what has happened and may still be happening and you begin to slowly learn to let go of the hopes of a better past. Not forgiving is like a red dye that colours every part of you, even when you are not aware of it, even when you think you have contained it.
Before the Process, you will be heard deeply and apprised of what this therapy entails, what forgiveness is and is not and why it is difficult to forgive. Depending on each client and trauma, the work may take one session or many, the sessions may last one or two hours and hypnotherapy or guided meditation could be introduced in the beginning.
During the Process, you are guided in a safe and gentle way which takes you down to the different layers of your emotions and relates them to your cellular memories. The Forgiveness Process could trigger past traumatic events and provide you with an opportunity to converse with those who have caused you pain, to understand them, if not at the personality level, then the soul level and to forgive them and your younger self.
Joyce guided me through the Forgiveness Process with love, compassion and understanding. Being a powerful combination of hypnotherapy and journey work, I was a little nervous before we started the session. But I needn't have worried - the experience was gentle yet profound. Past life events, memories and hidden pain revealed themselves and even loved ones who had passed away came through with advice for me!
Needless to say, I'd never had such an incredible experience before the Forgiveness Process - it gave me an amazing opportunity to put to rest anxieties and fears, and forgive past actions of others who'd caused pain. Throughout the process Joyce was communicating, assuring me that I was totally safe. And I was. Since then, my life has become one of potential and creativity - in fact, it feels as if my true self that I'd had been locked away since childhood has returned.
Emiline Walker, writer
Thank you for guiding me through the Forgiveness Process. I've definitely felt it is worthwhile to say the least. This week has been rather odd, in that I can't stop writing music!! I seem to find it much easier to do stuff whether it be planning lessons for school or writing music or going to the gym, than not. I'm hoping it will last.
I feel a constant need and urge to do stuff. I feel like I'm less hard on myself about things and even though writing music can be frustrating and it's not as great as I would like it to be I keep persevering. I think the things that stuck with me from our session are that I do believe that it is safer to go for my dreams than stay where I am and it's ok to want adventure and not want to settle down just yet.
I'm redoing The Artist Way and am at the end of week five at the moment so I think this is assisting with matters, but since the Forgiveness Process there has been a big shift and leap in moving forward. I think before something was holding me back that made all hard, but everything seems to flow a bit more and I don't get bogged down with thinking too much or analysing, worrying etc.
I hope many other people benefit from the Forgiveness Process and your guidance.
Laura Candy, music teacher
For me the session itself was surprising, I hadn't expected it to be so spiritually cleansing... helping to calm the inner turmoil locked in my heart which would seem to have arisen from my Mother's issues with my Father which caused a lot of rows between them over weekends through my childhood (until my Father died when I was nearly 9 years). This process has introduced me to a feeling of peace and wellbeing that cancels the fear held in my heart, making me realise that these were their issues and behaviour and not mine, so it doesn't matter for me. Also realising that I must not repeat the pattern and make my son feel scared and upset from rows between me and my husband - perhaps be a little more gentle on them both.
I feel more focused, less stressed and emotionally raw and for 2 nights now I have slept the whole night through really well - over the last year I have been having trouble sleeping through the night (waking up at 4 or 5am and not being able to get back to sleep) - I hope the good sleep pattern continues as it helps me deal with a lot of things that need clearing up in my life right now.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Maria Priestley, brand consultant
8 WEEK MINDFULNESS COURSE
The 8 Week Mindfulness Course is based on three decades of scientific research and combines the Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) course developed by Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn with all that Mindfulness Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) has to offer.
When I started the 8-week mindfulness course with Joyce, I had already spent over a year benefitting from her skills as a counsellor. I was going through a period of major flux in my personal and professional life and Joyce’s kindness, wisdom and patience were hugely beneficial. The mindfulness course with Joyce significantly changed my life.
My ability to recognise and handle my own stress improved vastly. Joyce patiently guided me through and helped me recognise old and stubborn patterns, and helped me find the skills and tools to change them. Her warmth and laughter are a joy, and I can safely say that my new mindful way of life has improved the quality of my life. I’ve successfully beaten my emotional eating habit, can manage pain through meditation and can’t stop telling everyone about it!
Shahnaz Chatterjee, trainer
I contacted Joyce at a time when I felt my emotions, mainly anger and frustration, were beginning to damage not only me but more importantly the people I loved. I knew nothing about mindfulness courses but following a brief review of the basic principles involved and my trust in the wonderful Joyce, I decided to give it a go.
When I started the 8 week course I felt my life was in chaos - I had just lost my job and I was moving out of my long term flat. The course required finding a little time each day for me to be calm and still and with the help of guidance tapes as necessary, to go through a routine of concentrating on my breathing. Simple really! I had never practised any form of meditation before so of course my mind constantly drifted away from the focus of my breath and my body.
The beauty of mindfulness however is there is no correct way of doing it; there is no success or failure. All that is required is to be aware and present and each time thoughts appear simply recognise them, welcome them and then let them go. Practising mindfulness on a daily basis is the key. My feelings of anger and frustration have not gone away but I now feel I have a technique to help me deal with them and in time I hope I will retrain my natural fight response to difficult situations to a more measured, less confrontational and less damaging response. Thank you, Joyce!
Dr. Jennifer Fallon, scientist
For more information, please click here to visit my 8 Week Mindfulness Course page.
LIFE COACHING
Life Coaching is based on a working partnership between you and me to bring out the best in you. Since you are in a better position to know who you are and what you want from life, my role is hold up a clear mirror to you using my skills and experience.
I was facing several transitions in my life and I found the life coaching by Joyce incredibly useful. I needed to find a clear way forward and to address my feelings about my future as regards my new career, financial security, relationship with my partner and having a child.
Joyce used a number of exercises e.g. the funeral speech and values and needs exercise to make me aware of what was really important to me. By going through my values with Joyce and answering her thought provoking questions, I was able to find a way forward. I realised that if I were to spend more time on my relationship, I would have to sacrifice some things that were less important. I feel more prepared for what the future may bring and more ready to start a family.
Joyce is incredibly in tune with me and has a very creative, fluid coaching style which she is able adapt to her client's needs.
Joanne McDowell, counsellor and mentor
After forty life coaching sessions with Joyce, I could hardly recognise the person I was when I started the life coaching. Initially, I presented Joyce with a relationship issue I wanted to deal with, and it became very personal and sometimes difficult. I felt I was able to trust Joyce completely and she never judged and was "with me" in whatever emotions I was expressing, even when I was transferring my anger to her. As I became more comfortable with who I was, I was better able to get involved in healthier relationships.
One of the issues Joyce was able to address with me was clarity, as regards clarifying my needs, values and vision. And she would remind me of them when I decided on new directions to take, be it personal or professional, and would challenge me when I was at odds with them.
Although Joyce always followed my agenda, there was something more purposeful about the journey I was in, whereas before there were lots of chaos and going around in circles. Sometimes, Joyce would remind me how far I have come by acknowledging my achievements.
Now that I am engaged to a lovely man, have a job as manager in Qantas and become an Aussie resident with my fiance, I often think of Joyce and how much she has helped me feel as happy as I am today. I would have no hesitation in recommending Joyce to anyone considering entering a coaching relationship.
Louise Raggett, psychologist and human factors specialist
For more information, please click here to visit my Life Coaching page.
*Some names are changed to protect the identity of my clients / students.
WE ARE NOT PROBLEMS TO BE FIXED, BUT PEOPLE TO BE UNDERSTOOD (JCB)
